bob marley's thoughts on love.

Bob Marley on loving a woman. Sweet. :)

Bob Marley on finding and loving the perfect guy. A lesson for women who have high standards. Ouch. haha

the joy of less

"And I remember how, in the corporate world, I always knew there was some higher position I could attain, which meant that, like Zeno’s arrow, I was guaranteed never to arrive and always to remain dissatisfied."

"Perhaps happiness, like peace or passion, comes most when it isn’t pursued."

- The Joy of Less, Pico Iyer



good stuff. it actually left me speechless. :)

October 2011

I am so looking forward to that day when I take that October 18 flight to start my most awaited trip to India and Nepal, and not be stuck here in this office chair of mine looking at traveller’s blog entries. Cursing their insanely beautiful and exciting photos, and laughing at their adventures and misadventures.

But they’re enough to get me through the day. Plus this one (I love his photos)!

It' been ten months since this idea came up.

Five more months until this idea becomes a reality. :)

buen camino!

thankful that I don't have to go to work today and instead have a doublevanilla tea latte, have some peaceful time with my own thoughts, and just relax.

Got this from FB's God wants you to know app:
"...that this world was made for you too. Enjoy it, explore it, experience it. Don't hold back. It is God's gift to you. Don't be a wallflower in the dance of life."

An officemate lent me a dvd last week - "The Way" by Emilio Estevez. It's about an American doctor (Martin Sheen) who went to France to recover the body of his dead son (Emilio Estevez) who died during the first day of his pilgrimage through The Camino de Santiago. Driven by grief and guilt for not supporting his son's dream, he decided to finish the 800km walk to the Santiago de Compostella in Spain. He meets 3 more pilgrims and together they learn more about each other and build a friendship and share such a memorable life experience. It's such a beautiful and inspiring movie.

From the official website:

In the film, a father unfortunately comes to understand his son's life through his death and along the road finds himself as well. The main protagonist of the film is the conflict we each have within ourselves of choosing a life versus living a life. This greater question of finding oneself is a matter of acceptance and choice. Given the circumstances of our lives, how do we understand ourselves, our family and our friends, and the choices we make? Do we blindly go through life unaware of our actions and how they affect not only ourselves but others, as well? What role does our community, friendships and faith play in our decisions?

The Camino, by its nature, serves as the ultimate metaphor for life. Footsteps along a well-trodden path may be our guide, but do not shield us from the questions that most of our busy everyday lives prevent us at times from fully recognizing. The road offers very little to hide behind. The process of life is life along whichever road, path, Camino, or Way we find ourselves on. Our humanity toward ourselves and others, our history and our future is what defines us. Take the journey of life. Buen Camino.

The decision has been made. I'm resigning from my job this year and I'm going to travel, experience India and trek the Himalayas. It's really a matter of deciding when I'm going to do it.

1) Do I stick it out until October and spend a few more months doing something I don't like and deal with unreasonable people? But spend my 26th in the Himalayas and travel for 2 and a half months.

2) Or quit my job this June and be finally free from all negativities of the office? Travel end-August and hope that the monsoon season is over in India but might cut the travel short and also risk not making it to one of my closest friend's wedding.

Honestly when I'm at work and the negativities come up, I just want to quit right away. But when I'm at home, when I'm with my friends, and now, I think I can still take all the crap in the office and wait for October.

"Kung saan ka at peace, yun ang tamang direksyon." - from my good friend, Mayen.

I'm more at peace with the original plan of leaving this October. I think it's going to be quite hard eating more crap and shit at work but I've made it this far right? I'm so stubborn and such a masochist. hahaha

On a lighter note, I think I want to do the Camino de Santiago. The small towns and villages along the way are so pretty, the trek itself seems light and the landscapes and churches along the way are beautiful. And just being far away from the noise and chaos of big cities - haaay. :)

hiraaaapppp

alam mo yung ayaw mo na magreklamo kasi sobrang negative mo na tapos ayaw mo na siyang ispread? pero alam mo naman na kapag hindi mo nilabas bibigay ka na.

so dito ko na lang ilalabas lahat para wala masyadong additional negativity sa mundo.

pero parang bibigay pa din ako.

ang hirap naman.

this time will pass

Is it really not enough that all I know for now is that I don’t want to do this anymore and that I just want to travel? Is it too wrong and irresponsible that I don’t really know where and what I am going to be after this?

I ask these questions from the people whose approvals matter but whose answers will not make me move forward.

I should have been asking myself these questions.

I should learn to listen to myself first and be accountable for whatever is it I am going to do. I should ask myself if I’m willing to be irresponsible by society’s and my parents’ standards and make my dream come true.

I should start accepting that giving up this comfortable lifestyle may be hard but it has to be done for now.

I should believe in myself and know that I can go through this.

That for the first time I should just do something and stop suffering, and start being happy that it will all be over soon.

One to two months of travelling and just taking photos? That's happiness for me. I'm smiling while typing this. :)

No more marketing and retail? No more mean AOs and clients shouting at me over money? No more office politics and gossiping? Now, that's peace and quiet.


And you are such a fool
To worry like you do
I know it's tough
And you can never get enough
Of what you don't really need now, my, oh my

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Oh love, look at you now
You've got yourself stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it

And if the night runs over
And if the day wont last
And if our way should falter
Along the stony pass
Its just a moment
This time will pass

one step closer to knowing

thank you, U2. i love how this song is giving me hope right now.

One Step Closer - U2

I'm 'round the corner from anything that's real
I'm across the road from hope
I'm under a bridge in a rip tide
That's taken everything I call my own

One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing

I'm on an island at a busy intersection
I can't go forward, I can't turn back
Can't see the future
It's getting away from me
I just watch the tail lights glowing

One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
Knowing, knowing

I'm hanging out to dry
With my old clothes
Finger still red with the prick of an old rose
Well the heart that hurts
Is a heart that beats
Can you hear the drummer slowing?

One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing

i think i'm a bit jaded

I overanalyze. I overthink. That’s just who I am.

But to acknowledge to myself that I’d rather be alone than take a risk and find out if I can actually be happy with someone? It’s alarming, sad, and pathethic. But it seems to be my truth now.

What the hell happened to me? hahaha