We were talking about the GAME people play. How to play it and when to know if someone’s a player. I told them that I don’t want to and I don’t think I’m emotionally strong enough to play it.
Then things happened. (Disclaimer: It was nothing major, but it was something quite huge of a step for me.)
At first there were the unnecessary attention and efforts to talk to me and sit beside me. Or to ask if I was feeling okay or if I need help. Then there were the cuddly things that I didn’t know how to respond to.
Then there was the alcohol. Alcohol strips you off slowly of your inhibitions. (My inhibitions since he wasn't allowed to drink alcohol.)
Then I responded to the efforts. And I’m glad I did. It was short, it was sweet, there were butterflies in my stomach and up until now they still linger.
They asked me if I would be interested in him since he told one of them that he is interested in me. I told them that I don’t know and I just found myself responding to it and actually liking it. Because I know that things can and will probably be different once we’re all back to reality, where convenience and time are luxuries. I’m just glad that it happened and that he was a nice and great guy.
But more than anything, I’m so glad that I allowed myself to feel something even for just a few days. And that I allowed myself to have fun and be appreciated.
It was such a funny and sweet experience that it deserves a blog entry. :)
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