reminders

I found this unpublished entry while cleaning up my flash drive.

09.27.10

There is a reason why we keep copies of the things we wrote before – may it be a journal, a diary, scribbles on a paper, or a blog. There is a reason why it’s important to write things down at that very moment you felt something. May it be joy, sadness, desperation, excitement, or just pure boredom.

It reminds you of why things happened, of why you made certain hard decisions in life. It’s somehow a check and balance of how much you have improved as a person.

Reading it after a year either makes you realize that you should commend yourself for getting over something; or to remind you for the nth time why you shouldn’t go back, why you should continue moving forward.

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I really can't remember what made me write this entry back in September 2010. But I think it deserves to be published.

I feel it is very timely. Given the fact that it's going to be August soon.

It's really going to happen.

Am I anxious? Yes.
Do I feel like backing out? The idea pops into my head from time to time. But it was never a strong idea and I've always known that it's not an option.
Do i feel the need to look for another job and hope that they allow me to come in January 2012? Yes, sometimes. But I always remind myself of why I'm doing this in the first place.
Am I scared? Yes, very much. But the feeling of excitement is just too powerful.

It really is the fear of the unknown that causes all these anxieties and fears. But something more powerful is pushing me forward. And forward I go. :)